Parenting Needs Reformation!

I am not sure if my views will be welcomed or not by the parents of today. I have decided to keep up my views in front of parents of today n make them realize their follies while parenting the kids, I am using the kids bcoz the present generation is in so hurry or insecure that they inspire for a single child, without giving a second thought from the perspective of their child…they think more of themselves n pursue the things in which they are comfortable.

The first thing that I dislike about current couple is that they go for no child or a single child.

If one is not going for a child that means that the couple is not competent enough to take the responsibility of a child or fears commitment and their marriage is just for pleasure n a partner. No grudges for this couple as they are not risking the life of a child, they aren’t comfortable with bearing, it’s well n good, it’s your life as you take it.

The couple who settles for a single child is not at all doing justice to the child. You may ask me, “How”. You are isolating your child n blessing him with the burden of loneliness & over-attention of parents. The strings of love n affection are very selfish & possessive and your all expectations n desires are on that single child and the child feels the heat of it, as he grows up. The parents will be over-caring n overprotective n he alone will have to suffer the brunt of it.

Further, the couple is depriving the child of the right of having siblings. No matter, how much time and affection the couple gives, still the child feels the lack of siblings and they become selfish, self centered and ask for more attention and they throw lot of tantrums or are very introvert.

I request all the couples to think twice and take right decision  not to snatch their sibling. The kids feel the need of a companion and when the parents bid goodbye, at least they have a shoulder to cry on or share their emotions.

Secondly, the parents of today are quite liberal in providing things to the kid and highly ambitious to see their child top in the class.

At times, I feel like laughing at the parents when they say, “I fulfill the total desires of my child, I don’t deprive of them as my parents deprived me of.”

“Are you doing the right thing?”

“No, you are playing with your child’s future n if the child is been provided the things with ease, they don’t feel the importance of the things and in the long run, they are casual.”

Emotionally, they turn out weak because you never gave them the opportunity to strive. As he wished, you procured the next day and so he takes it easily and in life, he can’t sustain a No to his demands and in the long run, the child turns into ego centric individual.

The demands of parents to see their child come out with cent per cent result too puts undue pressure on the child and the consequences are at times scary.

Identify your child’s potential n prune n mould him accordingly. A fish can swim in water, an elephant can’t. A horse can run fast but can’t swim in water, so in the best interests of the child, identify their interests n pursue accordingly. All children can’t become toppers.

To save your child from mental pressure, parents needs to reform their parenting pattern.

  1. Go for two children, gift your child a sibling.
  2. Make child understand the value of things n don’t fulfill your dreams through him & ruin his future.
  3. Don’t pressurize your child in academics.

The rising cases of suicides are also due to these reasons because they cannot handle pressure n they succumb to it.

Raise them with love & care, show them the middle path to follow.

Bring in change in handling kids and see the transformation within them and save the future of your children.

Yes, Parenting do need transformation, it’s my view.

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10 Comments Add yours

  1. Carol Graham says:

    I agreed with a lot of the things you said. However, there are many women who cannot have more than one child.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Me Otherwise says:

    Agree that a sibling is a much needed order of the day considering extended families are far apart and cousins are few. BUt there are other issues of modern day living, and tackling them are tough indeed. HEnce despite the want of a second child, most prefer not considering the option

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ila Varma says:

    Dear, single child is difficult to handle n later in life, he feels lonely n burdened by the responsibilities of parents. We need to think from both sides, as a parent n as a child, then your outlook will not biased.

    Like

  4. Amit Misra says:

    Such a proper article on a topic which is so close to my heart! In addition to your suggestions on discipline of children, I feel that parents should act as a role model for the children and set up an example by their behaviour.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ila Varma says:

      Thanks a lot for stopping by.It’s true, to take the kids on right stream, parents need to be on right path. in this article my stress was that the parents try to fulfill their kids demands trying to fulfill their desires which wasn’t fulfilled.

      Like

  5. Bold and courageous writing, agreed with all of your points.

    Like

  6. Great Post, Ila. I totally agreed with your views. But I’m also a mother of single child. Not because of choice but because of health issues. I too go with you …. Parenting needs reformation and that too at the earliest !!!

    Like

    1. Ila Varma says:

      Thanks Vasantha, health issues are genuine issues to refrain, but generally people comments is, “ek hi nahin sambhal raha doosra kahan n other flimsy excuses which I call filmy excuses

      Liked by 1 person

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